number: i gave in

Well, today I will live a twenty-two hour day.

There will literally be only 22 hours in my day.

Why?

Because two hours of my life were wasted, WASTED I tell you.

On what? You might ask.

On TWILIGHT

Two hours I will never get back.

I got two hours older...for trashy Twilight.

You all, knowing my feelings on this, probably are asking,

"Twilight?! Why, Laura, WHY?!"

Well, here's how it happened:

My sister, a true-blue twilight guru begged me to watch this movie with her.

"Give it chance!" she said

"If you don't like it after you watch it I won't bug you about it any more, promise!"

So, I gave in.

Little sisters have a way of being annoyingly cute, stubborn, and irresistible...well, at least mine is...Anyhow, we put the movie in.

I went in thinking that this was going to be the worst movie I'd ever seen.

I probably was going to hate my life.

I've found that pessimism can actually make events/movies/experiences all the more enjoyable..because you set your expectations low. Therefore, you have a richer experience and find delight in ways you otherwise would not.

Alas, Twilight is an exception to this rule.

I did not hate it, mind you, but I found it altogether ridiculous, trashy, and not beneficial.

Here's why:

Edward compares Bella to heroin. Oh.My.Gosh. If a boy ever compares me to a drug I will ship him to some kind of rehab. Get out of my life, trashy boy.

The acting was sub-par. Actually, worse. I won't say any more on that. If you've watched it, you know what I'm talking about. If you haven't...let's just say that I laughed out loud in several scenes. *And by several I mean all but one.*

Bella and Edward look lustfully into one another's eyes too frequently and for durations of time that even married people should avoid. Laying in a field looking at each other and then Edward's skin sparkling? Give.Me.A.Break.

The one, and I mean ONE redeeming quality of this movie was Bella's annoying friend Jessica who had some semi-witty comments that accurately portrayed those of a teenage girl.

The movie ended and my sister looked at me and said,

"So, aren't you intrigued enough to read the books?!"

No. No, sweet, beautiful, darling sister.

I then received a lecture from her on why Twilight is really the best and that I was insane not to like it. My opinion was apparently flawed.

I continue my point: I lost two hours of my life.

And my sister did not accept that I did not like that movie.

That was the real tragedy.

On the positive side I had a lovely Christmas.

My family is wonderful.

I love spending time with them.

Also, watched 500 days of summer and loved it.

I did not waste an hour and a half on that one.

I'm just sayin'.

...until next time...

number: the "tw"s of twhis tworld two

Twelcome back!

I know that the anticipation must have been terrible.

So, let's recap- and the recap is if you did not read yesterday's post, please read "number: the 'tw's of twhis tworld" before you read this post. This post will make much more sense if you have read its counterpart prior.

We good? Great! Let's get started.

Twilight.

The second issue in my life that is apparently cool, but I refuse to believe so.

My point may not be as drawn out as it was with Twitter, but my heart is still firmly set on not reading this book series.

For those of you living under a rock for the past year or two, Twilight is a book series about vampires, werewolves, and one girl named "Bella" who gets mixed up in their mess.

Some of you are probably thinking, "Uhh, I thought you haven't read Twilight"

Well, I haven't. I have friends who have.

They all tell me how much they love Twilight.

However, they all seem to have a complaint about the series, despite their deepest affections.

I hear things like this a lot:

"Bella is so annoying! I just can't even stand her"

"These books really aren't that well written, but I can't stop reading it"

"Some of it seems a little unrealistic."

Okay...a few comments in response to these comments:

Uhh...You are reading a book where the main character is annoying? Why?

I already have an addiction to trashy television and people magazine. No need to read these books too.

Okay. Um...is it just me or do vampires not exist? I'm just curious.

I've read a couple excerpts from the book. Because hey, with all the hype I thought, "What the heck, I might read this!"

But, nay. Nay I say.

Some of the language is a little on the over-the-top adjective side- if you don't believe me, please just read this excerpt:

"My eyes traced over his pale white features: the hard square of his jaw, the softer curve of his full lips—twisted up into a smile now, the straight line of his nose, the sharp angle of his cheekbones, the smooth marble span of his forehead—partially obscured by a tangle of rain-darkened bronze hair… " from Eclipse by Stephanie Myer I in no way wrote this.

Honestly...sounds like some romance novel. A romance novel for teenagers.

Listen people you don't have to agree with me.

All I'm sayin' is that Twilight appears to be a book that is written fairly, with a main character that is not only flawed but annoyingly flawed, with too many adjectives to speak of, and for drama-stricken teenagers mixed up in the agnst of love, hate, and gossiping behind their best friend's back.

Nay. Nay I say.

I am a naysayer.

Twilight, I will never love twhee.

Well, that ends this mini-series.

...until next time...