number: tuesdays with marinara

Tuesday morning was the morning from a not so nice place.

Tuesday morning marked a significant memory for me.

And here's how:

Actually, I awoke still elated from meeting the Pioneer Woman.

I was happy! I couldn't wait to jump in the shower and get ready to go to work.

I then did my hair and make-up.

I was on time. No, I was early- something I am not very often.

Then these three characters walked in:

Here's what happened:

I walked into the kitchen in my bathrobe to get my clothes out of the dryer.

But then I thought, "Hey, why not get my food ready? Then I can get my clothes and be even earlier." I think this was Diablo speaking. He usually likes to say things like this when mornings are looking so high up you can see the heavens.

So, I open my pantry to get this breakfast of champions:

Only the bag was a bit more full at the time.

I greedily pulled out the cereal to put in its travel container only to knock over this:

I watched in slow motion as the 26-ounce jar of marinara spiraled out of control.

There it was just spinning while I watched dumbfounded and hung on to that giant bag of under-priced cereal...there it was...just a jar...floating in air...

Aaaaannnddd then it shattered into a million pieces on my lovely tile floor.

Needless to say, glass and marinara were everywhere.

Then this guy, Raleigh:

Decided it would be a good idea to lick the pieces of glass free of the marinara sauce.

I decided that instead of making the situation worse in having my dog die from insecurity about being tongueless I distracted him so he would get outside.

The distraction was only so-so in its effectiveness because in the meantime he started jumping and my robe was getting loose...the neighbors might have seen more than they wanted to...I'm just sayin'.

Anyway, now it was time to go back inside and use these:

I started to clean up the mess but then my bathrobe kept plunging itself into the pile of marinara sauce. What was I to do?!?

Yeah, you guessed it, I took off my bathrobe.

So, there I was looking like this:

In the middle of my kitchen cleaning up marinara and glass...attempting to avoid getting glass stuck in my foot but really always getting glass stuck in my foot, while Raleigh, my dog, is jumping up and hitting the back door of the house for me to let him in so I am hearing "BANG! BANG!" about every six seconds.

Then my phone rings. It's my carpool ride. I can't pick up the phone because I am cleaning up marinara off the floor, the cracks of the door, under the bag of dog food, I'm naked, and Raleigh is calling for my attention.

She went to work without me.

but don't hate her...I had a car at my disposal. I decided going green was overrated on Tuesdays.

Needless to say, it was a morning.

I felt like I was Alexander in the middle of his Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Maybe I really should move to Australia.

...until next time...